Call Me Don, Don Whoreleone (robont) wrote,
Call Me Don, Don Whoreleone

Robs Wine Making Adventure Part Deux

OK so as you may or may not remember last month I got "inspired" to try and make my own wine..... OK maybe not my own... like from a kit... I didn't actually wanna do any real work or anything like picking grapes and smashing them with my ohhh soo delicate feet... let's be real here, I wanna open a giant drinking box throw some tumor causing chemicals in, stir it around and boom vintage wine.... *cough* ya... where was I again? ohhh right...

OK so I got lots of green bottles, some sterilization chemicals and a large ensuite bath tub that we have never used.... I actually think we found a use for it!!! Time to brew some wine bottle stew!!!

Ya know... this isn't the first time our tubs have been filled with empty liquor bottles... but usually there's also someone slumped over the toilet and the cat is walking funny... but we'll get into that another time...

Ohhh booze bottle christmas tree, ohhh booze bottle christmas tree... should have decorated that with swizzle sticks and cocktail olives....

Lucy really does follow me everywhere to see what I'm upto.... this night was nooooo exception

make sure the butt plugs corks are well soaked so they go in easier

WAIT!!! this fucking shit is turning into work!!!! my hands are all pickled and shit from all this water damnit!!!!!

Yep.... only the best for my wine..... I'm gonna make sure it's clear as possible by filtering it through some tampons.....

tampons... pads... same thing....

Dr Frankensteins lab in action...... (you had to know that I couldn't do this old school right? nothing is fun unless their are electrical gadgets that make noise involved ;-) )

Tub ooooooo booze ready for bottling :)

I stuck my tube in the bung hole!!!!! *snort*

Who knew my *cough* FRIENDS Swedish Penis Pump would come in handy for corking bottles?!?!?!?!

holy shit... the corking thing actually does work!!!

Ya have to know my wife was in the background yelling at me "Listen here you bald bitch you spilled wine on my hardwood floors !!! Get your tubby ass down there and clean them before they turn blue!!!!"***

even fucking Molly thinks I'm spazzy and THAT is saying something..... damn retarded dog

Dear Mr Newton, thank you for gravity, it makes filling the bottles much easier :)

Wine labelling station :) There is also the next kit I started right after this in the background... first was this Shiraz next is a White Zinfandel

ZOINKS!!!!!! Roooooooooooooooooby Racks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ohhh and me breaking out the steamer gizmo to seal the foil thingy.....

I'm fixating on the stupid scooby snacks.... wonder if they would go with red or white wine???

Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The first batch is done!!!!!!!!!!!!! OK well almost.... it's got to sit for another 3 months or so before you can drink it... it actually tastes alright but I'm sure with a little time it will get better... either which way we'll find out come april or so..... I did actually start the zinfandel kit right after I finished this batch, and that one will be ready to drink as soon as it's done so we'll see how that turns out....

Anyway, I knew a few of you were interested in trying it, it really isn't all that hard when you're doing it from the kit and it's a pretty good introduction to the process... I think this summer I'm gonna go to one of the local vineyards we have around us and buy some raw must and try to do it completely from scratch... you see the whole process doing it this way and I gotta admit, it is actually kinda fun to do so I will be doing it more in the future :)

***OK I probably should have taken a picture of this... but I kind of might have sorta spilled a little wine on the basement floor only to discover that red wine kinda sorta turns concrete blue..... luckily that is gonna get covered with a floor at somepoint ;-)
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